Hullo, are you 2007?

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Huuuuwarrrggghh ...* ... # ... hmmphh ... *

New Year oredi, aaah? .... *

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We would like to thank everyone who dropped by recently in the hopes of seeing something new on this blog.

We find such tenacity and doggedness among our steadfast readers to be very endearing, especially since they are definitely not, er, tenacious dogs?

And probably have absolutely no idea what those dogs were being tenacious about anyway. Well, let's not go there.

There are a number of reasons why this blog went un-updated for a bit but since I am someone with a lot of experience with people, I know that you lot don't give a toss about them.

So I'm just gonna get on with it, right?

A lot of matches have been and gone; but for the sake of keeping this blog complete, I've put together here a whirlwind tour.

Oldest matches first, newest at bottom.


THE GOONERS' YEAR-END PARTY


Executive Summary:
The party started with a whimper, bad weather contributing to a spate of no-shows at Bramall Lane, the fare was bad but the Blades seemed to enjoy themselves. Gooners badly hung-over.
Things picked up as the party moved back to London, the captain putting in a surprise appearance and setting things alight. Party animal der Pussie went hog and scoffed everything in sight after Henry and Hoyte tore into Charlton.
The climax of the party - a knees-up at Anfield, in front of a packed Kop. Rosicky stole the show with two cheeky skits and just when Poo's Kuyt gamely hauled them back into the spirit of things, Henry doused everyone after robbing Carra blind.

And nah, Kylie wasn't there ... *sigh.
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BUMS UP AT BRAMALL LANE

Blades 1
(Nade 41st)
The Arse 0
(everyone had brewer's droop)

The pitch was a paddy-field.
The refereeing was questionable.
And the goal was a joke.

Us?
We were fockin' pathetic.

Enuff said.

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THE RETURN OF LA CAPITAINE

The Arse 4
(Henry 30th pen, Hoyte 45th, der Pussie 76th pen, 90th)

Charlton 0
(This strain of Brewer's Droop was contagious)


After that poncy show at Sheffield, the whole team was led out by the returning Thierry Henry. Together with his irrepressible deputy, they proceeded to refresh the team's memory of what those egg-shaped bits inside a fleshy sac was for.

After Scott Carson heroics kept Charlton in the game somehow, Osei Sankofa decided to liven things up by pinching der Pussie's teats while everyone was looking up at Fabregas' effort that ballooned off the crossbar and floated for an eternity before coming back down in the 6-yard box.

Der Pussie went down in auto-spasm mode and the ref pulled out the red card.

Replays clearly showed that der Pussie actually org-ed during contact and thus it was a clear penalty and a deserved sending off for the surgical removal of Sanfoka's offending fingertips.

The captain duly converted and the Arse was deservedly one up.

Come the stroke (eh?) of halftime, Hoyte gallivanted down the right channel onto an Henry pass and somehow squeezed a shot under the luckless Carson.

This was a landmark goal - the last goal scored by an English player in Arsenal colours was Sol Campbell's in September 2005. Maybe Harry Redknapp will take Hoyte away as well and pay us a lot of money at the same time. We can only hope.

Charlton wilted in the second half and Henry earned another penalty after Diawara tugged him to the ground in the 76th which der Pussie blasted into the top left corner.

Der Pussie added no. 12 to his personal tally with a cheeky lift over the hapless Carson when he broke through onto a Flamini pass in the 90th minute.

But the day clearly belonged to La Capitaine.

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FA Cup, 3rd Round:
And STEVIE WONDERED

Lily's Poo 1
(Kuyt 72nd)

The Arse 3
(Rosicky 37th, 45th, Henry 84th)

Thomas Rosicky hit the woodwork twice in his last 2 games and had everyone wondering if he was an oversold item foisted on Arsene by Borussia Dortmund.

However he finally laid to rest all the doubts that had surfaced after a fairly lengthy barren spell after his goal against Hamburg.

Two cheeky strikes against a suspect Dudek took the wind out of a dominant Poo in the first-half, the second goal had Stevie G cringing away from making a block as Rosicky made his shot past Dudek - which raises questions about the Liverpool captain's composure while defending.

*Look Lily, I'm just picking up where Shebby left off, okay? Could you put those hubcaps back where they belong? Thanks. You're a luv.

Anyways Poo did come back manfully (why not womanfully, ah?) and pulled one back via a Crouch-Kuyt tag-team head spectacular in the 72nd but Thierry Henry, looking so sparkly after his enforced rest, buried the game after robbing Carra blind in the 84th.

Again Dudek was suspiciously slow in getting down to the low shot that zipped past his ankles.

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Overall it was a good year-end party.

We made a slow start but we managed to end it with a bang - and having it away as well.

And I'm hoping that I'll be able to say that again at the end of this season.
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