One good spank deserves another

Lily's Poo 4
(Crouch 4th, 35th, 81st, Agger 60th)

Gooners 1
(Gallas 73rd)

Oh God, not Crouchie ...

It was karma in full cycle.

They had let Bapfista score a hattrick the last time we spanked them and so it seems that on current form, we would have to return the favour this time.

And that's the way it turned out - a full spanking for us and a hattrick for, *gasp, the Gangly One.

Poor Arsene - discarding his normal suit and tie, he was sporting a collared-T and track-bottoms for a more casual look at the sidelines.

It must be spring already in Old Blighty but the blooms are not yet out for the Godfather - not the way the team was playing.

Poo stormed out of the blocks full of passion. Apparently Rafa had underhandedly tacked up the results of their previous three meetings with us in their dressing room and really fired up his team.

Fortune favoured them and in as early as the 4th minute, a backheel from Albeloa and a return backheel from Pennant sent the right-back down through our left flank.

Albeloa sent in a killer cross that Crotchie got to ahead of Toure to swipe in the first goal past Lehmann.

We tried to get going after that but Mascherano was proving his class with Xabi Alonso playing effectively off him in setting up Stevie G's forays into the final third areas.

Clichy was having a hard time coping with Pennant and Albeloa as Denilson was slow to cover the right-back when he surged up their right flank.

Cesc was having an off day and having Mascherano and Alonso ganging up on him every time he got the ball put him off his usual flowing stride.

Elsewhere, Eboue was similiarly having a torrid time with speedy Gonzalez.

This meant Toure was forever trying to cover Eboue and Gallas for Clichy and this freed up Crouch and Stevie G in the central areas with only Diaby in attendance.

We were overrun in the first 20 minutes and it was astounding that Poo only had the one goal to show in that period.

Then we started to press forward and Adebayor sent a header just over the bar with Pepet beaten.

But then Poo countered swiftly and a sweet cross from Aurelio on the left flank caught our defence out and Crouchie sent that firmly past Lehmann (captain of the day, by the way).

Adebayor was tireless up front but he was not getting good service as Mascherano bossed the midfield and Aurelio stuck close to him. Even then he managed to beat Pepet, only for the post to stand in the way.

That was when he wasn't let down by Bapfista who was looking more like a stylist without substance.

Teed up with a clear shot at the edge of the area, the Beast muffed the shot and killed someone in the stands instead of Pepet.

Attacking moves frequently broke down around him and it was an indictment on him that when Arsene brought him off for Ljungberg, the Arsenal attack looked more potent and cohesive.

It is disappointing that this player, whom Arsene had tried to sign and failed a few years back, would turn out to be a misfit.

Apart from the Mickey Mouse hattrick, he had been poor in linking with the others and in the tightly marked final third in this game where passes needed to be finessed through, his errors were too costly.

Adebayor again came close in the second half but Pepet tipped his shot onto the same post and a few minutes later Agger flicked in with his head a nicely judged free-kick from Aurelio in the 60th.

Gallas walked in one for us off a corner in the 73rd (we had 7, they had 2) but then Crouchie, brimming with confidence, wrongfooted Toure before hitting his third in with his left boot, completing his hattrick in the 81st.

We were well and truly spanked by a team bent on extracting vengeance for the humiliation we had heaped upon them in the recent past.

Nice thing about it was that they did it fair and square.

Well done, Scousers. Win or lose, it's always a pleasure playing y'all.

It's only that I feel so sorry for the Godfather.

... losing I can take but Crouchie with 3 ...?