Tuesday, June 02, 2009

A Man Called Hung

It was already past nine but the air was fairly sweltering at the night market around Co Ben Thanh in downtown Saigon.

Now known as Ho Chi Minh city, of course.

Ho's City, if you're a Yank ... I guess.

Under my rucksack, my shirt was getting sticky but I was enjoying myself immensely.

It has been a while since I went abroad (Shanghai was the last one, I think), or had a proper holiday actually, and the break couldn't have come at a better time for me.

After a fortnight of crisis calls plus a project that took off unexpectedly like a runaway rocket, I was stressed-out, fagged out and almost brain dead on my feet by the time I boarded the Airbus at half past seven in the morning at the LCCT.

Was that sentence too long? Deal with it - it's a fair reflection of my working life since November.

Anyway, back in Saigon (I still prefer this old name, I grew up with it being on the headlines and on TV almost every day in the late 60s) I was taking in the sights and sounds (and smells) contentedly while cowering behind two female colleagues for protection from the many pretty ladies manning the various stalls.

Protection?

Yes, protection. Seriously.

You see, Vietnamese ladies are mostly pretty, have good skin, look and sound demure but are also very persistent in making their sales pitch.

Very much self-aware of their effects on men visitors, they would think nothing of grabbing you by the arm and crying out,

"A-baaaaang, come and see my things, I give you good price,"

and pretty soon a soft female hand will be stroking your manly chest to add persuasive punctuation to it all, while the sales pitch changes to,

"I like your smile, where you from."

And if you got a pot-belly, the stroking moves south and they'll cackle, "Little Buddha!" delightedly.

The outdoor night market is infinitely more preferable than the daytime version - which is more congested and, since it's indoors, definitely stuffier than muff-diving.

I mean, once I entered I had to go out again after the first five minutes cos I couldn't breathe.

Whereas I can muff-dive longer than that even with one nostril shut.

Anyways after my nipples had gotten overly sensitive with all that stroking, I spotted something on top of my shopping list.

A stall displaying original oil paintings by local artists.

For some time, I've been told that you can get art pieces at bargain prices, especially oil paintings, in Saigon.

Mostly I was told they got good fakes there but I was thinking, if they're so good technically, then the originals should be better buys.

So, having spent a good part of the evening watching over the ladies, and getting molested for my troubles, I got stimulation of the cerebral kind at last.

At first I was struck by the stall-minder's demeanour.

Unlike the typical pasar malam hustling, he had a quiet, pleasant manner.

Such a welcome contrast.

I tested him by leaving after just a minute of browsing but he remained coolly polite and even thanked me for my time.

So after a bit, I came back, sat down on a stool, rolled me a fag and struck up a conversation with the guy.

It turns out that the stall houses the paintings of Hung, my new friend, and three of his friends, and they take turns minding it.

Taking a close look at the wares on display (even an untutored eye like mine could discern the four different styles), I found that I really liked this quietly pleasant chap.

So I was pleased to find out that a series of abstracts that I really liked was Hung's handiwork.

Taking the conversation further I found out he's actually a Hanoi boy - thus the very different personality compared to his neighbours - and that four years of art college in Hanoi was followed by eight years in Saigon peddling his stuff.

The boy got grit.

And he was so humble.

I had decided to buy two of his paintings when I noticed that they didn't have any signature.

"Hey Hung, how come these paintings don't have your signatures?"

"You want me to sign them?" he asked.

"Did you paint these paintings or not? Or are they your friend's paintings?" I asked again, making sure we understood each other.

"Yes, I painted them," he replied.

"Then sign the damn things lah," I said, lapsing into Manglish momentarily.

He wasn't so sure he understood me.

"You really want me to sign them?" the fella went again.

"Of course I want you to, you're the painter, right?"

"Yes, I am,"

"Then you must sign it. Otherwise how would people know you're the painter?" I berleter again.

I swear the man looked stunned.

"Oh, okay. Can you wait for five minutes?" he asked.

"No problem, why?"

"I call my friend to bring a tube for the painting, then I have to get my brush and ink," he said.

When his friend turned out to be a pretty girl, I was kinda worried my nipples might get tweaked again. But she was a decent sort - his girlfriend actually (I asked) - and she came from the same village as Hung.

So sweet.

All in all I spent about two hours there, and they were pleasant hours, I must say.

And I ended up paying just USD90 for two oil paintings that I liked very much.









Originals by a man called Hung.

16 comments:

Valisa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Valisa said...

you mean despite paying THAT much, you didn't get your nipples tweaked? aiyoyoh cipan RUGIIIIIIII NYER!!!!

Loverly paintings btw!

an0nymous-ign0ranus said...

how come you are not writing for travel times or itu MAS punya magazine?

Leen AshBurn said...

This is such a loverly post. ALmost make me want to go to Air asia website and get my nipples twea..eh, and book a flight to Saigon.

Rt Hon Sir Cipan Nougat-Tenuk said...

Valisa,

If I was really looking to have my engine tweaked instead, it would have cost just USD50 at the hotel spa.

And that includes a 2-hour massage.

:D

Plague,

Well, if I write for them then I'll have to leave out all those juicy parts, kan?


Leen,

Oh, thank you, luv.

Air Asia should name Saigon as a really tweaky destination, eh?

an0nymous-ign0ranus said...

tok cipan, of course you can still write about all those juicy stuff. Just reword/rephrase them.

It's been done before.

heh heh ...

Rt Hon Sir Cipan Nougat-Tenuk said...

plague,

U mean instead of saying nipples, I say "the pointy knobs on my chest"?

Hmmm ... possible.

But what about muff-diving then?

Didi G said...

how big is your little buddha?

Rt Hon Sir Cipan Nougat-Tenuk said...

didi,

Ahem, Little Buddha means the potbelly, occay ... (just so we're absolutely clear here) ... I just bought new pants yesterday - had to go one size up.

Still just 35", meh ... masih ramping, yo - relatively, I guess ... :D

Maklongnya Bedah said...

did hung posed wif one of the paintings that u bought? if yes, saya sukalah! bila nak snap & post the picca of the other painting?

Rt Hon Sir Cipan Nougat-Tenuk said...

maklong,

He posed wif both pics in that pic.

See my update above ... the plague dah kutuk dah pun ... :p

deianira said...

Oh I so love 'Ho's City'! You're right about the congested and stuffy Ben Thanh market, though I wouldn't quite compare it to muff-diving... and I did get a massage at one of those sleazy salon-cum-brothel setups. Boyyyyy it was goooooood. The viet chicks were SO sexy and good looking, I started to ask myself questions like 'if i were a man/lesbian, which one will I choose?' Ha!

And did you get your coffee fix at their 'Starbucks' joint called PHUC LONG coffee? Yeah, I know, what a name. I kid you not!

As always, another great entry!

Rt Hon Sir Cipan Nougat-Tenuk said...

deanira,

Hey, good to hear from you again!

And yeah - got more stories along those lines, actually *hehe

Oh - I missed out that Phuc Long. Went instead to the Highland Coffee franchise and asked for the traditional coffee (was this it?) instead.

Loved the yogurt bars, too ... :D

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Anonymous said...

*laugh*...at the Viet lady and their persuation skills..

Rt Hon Sir Cipan Nougat-Tenuk said...

Hi Meiyi,

Sorry I missed out your comment. Haven't been around for a long time.

Anyway, thanks for dropping by and hope you enjoy the blog.

Cheers!